She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
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