Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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