i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Randomize
