I accidentally had phone sex last night
If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Randomize
