Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Randomize
