okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
Randomize
