actually, I'm a sock model
well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
I just faked an interview like I fake a fucking orgasm. Wonder if these candidates can tell I'm a tired and hungover recruiter?
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
They took my balls.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
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