dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
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