i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
