What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
Randomize
