I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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