You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
Randomize
