My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
