its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
I am mentally ready for anal.
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