I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
Randomize
