what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
I FOUND THE LEGS
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
Randomize
