adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
