he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
I'm drunk at a fancy martini bar, wearing jeans, drinking cheap vodka that I brought in my purse. Got thrown out of court for using my cell phone. All in all calling Thursday a success.
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
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