In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
Drake has all the answers
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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