Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
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