They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
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