you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Randomize