I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
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