Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
Randomize
