wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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