god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
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When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
Sitting in bed reading a porn novel off my phone and accidentally just made Siri start reading the most graphic part aloud. FUN FIRST NIGHT WITH THE NEW ROOMIE.
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
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dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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