I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
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