Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
Randomize