i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
Randomize
