White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
Randomize
