I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Randomize
