Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
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