she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
This baby is an asshole
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
