Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
Randomize
