Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
Randomize
