Your face is a jimmy john
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
im having a threesome with these popsicles
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
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