So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
You are a genius and a whore.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
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