oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
