he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
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