Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize