Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
Randomize