Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
