If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Randomize