Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(313): View more from Michigan

Im at strip club and am horny

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(313): Im at strip club and am horny http://tfl.nu/rj7w

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(707): View more from California

I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.

(951): View more from California

That's the thing about women.

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(707): I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff. (951): That's the thing about women. http://tfl.nu/3r0z

Replies (6) Good night (664) Bad night (2337)
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(206): View more from Washington

I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark

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(206): I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark http://tfl.nu/8yek

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(603): View more from New Hampshire

the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...

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(603): the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing... http://tfl.nu/ohtd

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(401): View more from Rhode Island

yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car

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(401): yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car http://tfl.nu/wwsk

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(612): View more from Minnesota

maybe i'll see you again later :)

(774): View more from Massachusetts

I'd rather shit a knife.

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(612): maybe i'll see you again later :) (774): I'd rather shit a knife. http://tfl.nu/qge0

Replies (50) Good night (1720) Bad night (10739)
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(301): View more from Maryland

We're doing a case race on Saturday.

(302): View more from Delaware

I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"

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(301): We're doing a case race on Saturday. (302): I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism" http://tfl.nu/1jnr

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(578): View more from

oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.

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(578): oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home. http://tfl.nu/mth9

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(917): View more from New York City

Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.

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(917): Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us. http://tfl.nu/44xm

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(202): View more from Washington, DC

WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?

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(202): WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT? http://tfl.nu/xll1

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(701): View more from North Dakota

Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?

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(701): Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard? http://tfl.nu/5yc2

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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on

(484): View more from Pennsylvania

Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.

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(610): Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on (484): Who said I was judging? More like congratulating. http://tfl.nu/coiy

Replies (10) Good night (2084) Bad night (507)
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(608): View more from Wisconsin

It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes

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(608): It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes http://tfl.nu/xen4

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(619): View more from California

Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it

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(619): Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it http://tfl.nu/st9u

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(707): View more from California

The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.

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(707): The acoustics in my bra are fantastic. http://tfl.nu/vfao

Replies (7) Good night (895) Bad night (249) Order T-Shirt

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