i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Randomize
