hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
Randomize