i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Randomize
