Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
I party with great urgency now.
Randomize
