if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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