Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
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